Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize