the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
