i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
