She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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