Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
