He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It was a blind-side dick pic.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
