Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Semen is not good for contacts.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
COCAINE IS GR8
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
