I love black thongs
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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