Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
is this the sara with the beer cane?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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