i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
