We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize