Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
