Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
