Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
