Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
