No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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