what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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