that's an acceptable place to lick
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
