I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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