...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
She needs sedatives and a leash
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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