Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
