I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
