everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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