That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
