I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
