Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Dear god my vagina.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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