piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
