Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
