I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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