i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
