Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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