whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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