My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
