I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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