Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
