I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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