My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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