Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
