come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize