So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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