it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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