But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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