I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
