In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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