This girl is more easily done than said...
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
