RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Randomize
