Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
