I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
