Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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