My dream of liquor pitchers came true
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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