hell yes lets make some ravioli
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
